Stupid Statement #5

This week's Throwback Thursday coincides with a Stupid Statement made by Gooseberry Banana. So this Stupid Statement will have a bit of a story to it.

It was the night Kumquat Desert fig, Kiwi Oil palm and I moved into our 11OH!7 house, Gooseberry was visiting for the evening and helping us break in the place properly. Which in our world meant tequila. Shots! Shots! Shots! (EVERYBODY!) At some point Gooseberry meandered over to our neighbors' house, after she made quite a show, (I can only assume, I wasn't there) they came over to our house and asked us to collect our friend. I stumbled over expecting to find her passed out on a couch. Instead I had to journey to the bathroom, after passing a bicycle in a shower I found Gooseberry hugging the most disgusting toilet, seat up at that!  I tried coaxing her away from the porcilean throne and she wouldn't budge. Hoping to get her to understand the gravity of the situation, I told her to look at me, her response was:

"I'm not looking at you unless you're a toilet"

Stupid Statement #4

I was recently trying to explain to a coworker that I like turkey, just not when it's in the form of lunch meat that you get from the deli. He was saying it's the same thing either way. Turkey is turkey. In the end, I thought the best way to prove my point was to say:

"I only like turkey when it's still shaped like a bird."

stupid statement #3

"It's like I have a third sense or something"

stupid statement #2

The following is a statement my friend made after she was invited to hang out with me, dewberry, kiwi oil palm and her boyfriend

"No, because then I'll feel like a 4th wheel"

stupid statement #1

The following is a story told by a classmate when I was in elementary school:

"One time I had a grapefruit and it was so bitter my mom had to put more sugar on it"